Well This Sucks
by That One Apologue
Summary: ABANDONED! Selected superstars of the WWE are taken to school! This time it ain't kindergarten, but sixth grade! How will they cope with the evil seventh and eighth graders that are out to make their life a living hell?
1. Chapter 1

**Well This Sucks... Chapter One**  
**Summary: **Selected superstars of the WWE are taken to school! This time it ain't kindergarten, but sixth grade! How will they cope with the evil seventh and eighth graders that are out to make their life a living hell?  
**Genre:** Humor  
**Rating:** PG-13  
**Disclaimer:** Ah, sure... I own the WWE and I'm a billionaire that has nothing better to do than write fan fiction... Riiight... Okay, so I lied, sue me, or well ah, don't sue me... It'd be a total waste of time man!  
**Archive:** & Beauty At It's Best  
**Pairing(s):** Read and maybe you'll find out...  
**Author Notes:** Sure it's 'similar' to the two stories that have the WWE characters in kindergarten, but not exactly... Plus this is not a normal junior high... Just go with whatever I'm saying, even if it sounds odd and out of this world...

The kids nervously awaited the bell to ring, curious of what their teachers would be like and what the classes would be like. Fifth grade was easy, but this was sixth grade. It was like being king of the hill, then being dragged off to the dungeon, now that must really suck. To think they worked five freaking years to get to the top, and now they're back at the bottom. Damn them. The simple fact that it'd take three years until they ruled the school once again could really piss someone off...

: The bell rang. :

Breaths were held as they entered hell, unaware if they were going to return or not. Some students were fortunate enough to get their locker open on the first try, while others had tried to open it at least four times. Stacy kicked her locker, she yelped as she stared down at her foot. Could this day get any worse?

"What'd you forget you had heels on?" Coach asked as he stared down at her feet.

I guess I spoke too soon...

"What's it to you Jonathan?" Stacy sneered.

Coach held his hands up in defense.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! I know you did not just call the Coach, Jonathan!" Coach exclaimed.

"Jonathan." Stacy repeated, sticking her tongue out.

"Child." Coach mumbled.

"Need help opening your locker kid?" JBL asked.

Stacy and Coach glared at the eighth grader, their jaws dropped to the floor.

"Ah... no... Mr. Eighth grader... I was... Ah... Bye!" Stacy muttered before running away.

"I... I like your hat, it's totally awesome." Coach replied as JBL straightened his tie.

"Why thank you... It's always good to see a sixth grader with good taste. How would you like to join..." JBL paused, three kids jumped behind him and said, "The cool group!"

Coach gasped.

"You'd let me, the Coach! Join the cool group!" Coach exclaimed.

"Of course... We love peeps who have good taste in clothes." Orlando replied.

"Cool, so what do I have to do to get in?" Coach asked.

The four eight graders exchanged the same look.

"You have to..." JBL started.

xxx

Meanwhile, Torrie and Candice were listening to Ashley's victory speech.

"I wanna thank the teachers who picked me! I'm so glad I won the 2005 Student Search!" Ashley exclaimed.

"I would have won if it weren't for the search being rigged..." Candice stated.

"It was not rigged!" Ashley snapped.

"You've gotta learn how to keep your mouth shut." Torrie mumbled.

Ashley narrowed her eyes on the two.

"You're just jealous!" Ashley sneered, sticking her tongue out at the two.

"We most certainly are not!" Torrie declared.

"Exactly... You suck!" Candice hissed.

"No you do!" Ashley argued.

"All three of you suck... Now get your candy asses to class." Rock ordered.

"You're not my mommy!" Candice snapped.

"Thank god for that!" Rock sneered.

Candice glared at the floor as Rock walked away, then it hit her.

"Wait! I meant daddy! Come back here! I'm not done talking to you!" Candice called as she ran after Rock.

Torrie shook her head and followed Candice and Rock down the hall. Ashley stalked after the very small group of misfits.

xxx

"Class take a seat..." Bischoff ordered as he walked into the room.

He stared down the kids, one by one. Finally when he came to Jericho did he stop.

"What is that!" Bischoff exclaimed as he glared down at Jericho's spot at the table.

"It's a trapper keeper, jackass." Jericho replied.

Everyone gasped, Bischoff tsked Jericho.

"Foul language is unacceptable in MY classroom! Go to the principals office and tell him what a bad boy you've been!" Bischoff exclaimed.

The class was silent as they glared at Jericho.

"Make me, assclown." Jericho snapped.

"Oh... I will!" Bischoff stated.

"Oh really? Well make me." Jericho ordered.

"Ah... Maybe later..." Bischoff mumbled, moving onto the next kid in line.

"I told you he was a wuss." Jericho mumbled to Shelton. "Pay up."

"I ain't payin' you shit..." Shelton replied.

"Yes, you are." Jericho argued.

"Am not... You stupid wanna-be rocker." Shelton snapped.

"What'd you say about my band?" Jericho sneered.

"Nothing... But now that you mention it. Your band is gay and you can't sing." Shelton hissed.

"You're gonna regret saying that..." Jericho mumbled.

Bischoff took his seat at the front of the class, he glared at the children.

"Does anyone have any talents?" Bischoff asked.

"I do!" Jericho exclaimed, raising his hand.

"Okay... Let's see it." Bischoff replied.

Jericho smirked and told Rock to get his guitar out of his locker. As soon as Rock returned they took their place at the front of the class, everyone watched curiously.

"This song has yet to be released..." Jericho announced.

"Okay..." Bischoff mumbled.

Rock started playing his guitar and Jericho started nodding his head to the music.

"Shelton Benjamin is a little bitch! Shelton is a little bitch!" Jericho sang.

Shelton's jaw dropped as the rest of the kids laughed and a few even sang along. Shelton glared at Bischoff, who was also singing along. He leaped out of his chair, climbed onto his desk and delivered a cross body to Jericho.

"Hey! Hey! Hey!" Bischoff exclaimed.

"What up Fat Albert?" John asked as he entered the classroom.

Bischoff held up his hand to scold him, but John only slapped his hand.

"My home boy! I can tell his is gonna be an awesome year man!" John declared.

Cena took his seat in the back of the room next to Maria and Eddie. Bischoff shook his head, how unlucky was he to get a class full of trouble makers? He sighed, before pulling Shelton and Jericho apart.

"Now Jericho you switch seats with... Ah, Trish." Bischoff ordered.

Trish grinned as she skipped to where Jericho used to be sitting and plopped down in the chair. Rock sat back down next to Trish and Hurricane, he crossed his arms.

"Now I'm not sitting by any of my friends..." Rock sneered.

"Deal with it!" Bischoff snapped.

Rock rolled his eyes as Shelton took his seat and Jericho took his new seat. Bischoff sighed and glared down at his papers.

"Moving on... Let's hand out the books." Bischoff stated.

He stood up and grabbed a brown box, he sat back down and started calling off names...

To Be Continued...

Sorry if it was short, but I didn't know what else to do. So, if anyone wants to see a certain pairing just say so...


	2. Chapter 2

**Well This Sucks... Chapter Two**  
**Summary: **Selected superstars of the WWE are taken to school! This time it ain't kindergarten, but sixth grade! How will they cope with the evil seventh and eighth graders that are out to make their life a living hell?  
** Disclaimer:** Still don't own anyone or anything...  
** Pairing(s):** Read and maybe you'll find out...  
** Author Notes:** More characters shall step in, pairings shall unravel... And MarTW, you shall get your wish. No way in hell will Randy & Stacy be paired together, if anything they will be exes and hate each other!

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After Bischoff handed out all of the books, Maria raised her hand.

"Yes..." Eric started, glaring down at his clipboard. "Maria?"

"Ah... What does r-u-l-e-s mean?" Maria asked.

Eric stared at her, trying to understand why she was so stupid.

"It means what you can and can't do, dummy!" Coach sneered.

"Thank you... Coach." Eric replied.

"You're welcome Mr. Bischoff!" Coach replied with a grin.

"Suck up..." Jericho hissed.

"You're only jealous cause I'm in the..." Coach started, three kids out of no where jumped out behind him and said, "The cool group!"

Jericho blinked. "Who are you people?"

"Do you even go to this school?" Torrie asked.

"We do so go to this school!" Danny exclaimed.

"Really? Prove it!" Candice replied as she crossed her arms.

"Okay... Your name is Candice Michelle." Doug stated.

"Oh my god! That is my name!" Candice exclaimed as she clapped her hands together.

"That's just great..." Orlando replied.

"Shouldn't you three be in class?" Eric asked.

"You never seen us..." Danny stated as they backed out of the room.

Doug held his hands up to make a fake gun and jumped out the door James Bond style. Danny did the same and Orlando only shook his head.

"I swear I don't know those guys..." Orlando muttered as he followed them out the door.

"Well that was interesting..." Eric mumbled.

"Are you kidding me! They came out of no where and then their exit... Oh god that was horrible!" Rock snapped.

"Okay..." Eric shook his head before the bell rang once more. "Go to your second hour class."

"Second hour class?" Maria asked.

"Look at your schedule, dimwit!" Coach sneered.

"He called me a dimwit!" Maria cried, "What is a dimwit?"

Most people just shook their heads, while others hurried out of the room so they wouldn't have to spend the rest of the day explaining the simple word dimwit.

---

"Get a partner! NOW!" Shrieked Mae.

"Ms. Young, I don't know anybody!" Maria exclaimed.

"Deal with it..." Mae snapped.

Everyone, but Trish, had found a partner quickly. Trish's best friends 'abandoned' her so they could be partners. She shook her head, grabbing Maria's wrist.

"I'll be your partner." Trish mumbled.

"Oh thank you! ... Trish?" Maria replied, unsure if that was her name.

"Yes... It's Trish."

"Okay... Now Coach and.. Danny? What are you doing here? You're not in this class. Coach you go pair up with Rock and Jericho." Mae ordered.

"What? Why do we have to team up with the retard?" Jericho complained.

"Shut up!" Mae snapped. "Now, we're going to play kick ball. When I point to you and your partner you go to where I say, okay?"

"Kick ball? Oh! I like kick ball!" Eugene exclaimed.

"That's nice... Jericho, Rock, Coach.. You're kicking. Eugene, Tajiri... You're in the out field. Trish, Maria, Candice, Torrie.. You're kicking. Lita, Victoria, Molly, Gail... You're in the out field. The group of ten over there, you're kicking... The rest of you are in the out field." Mae finished.

"But what about me, sir?" Asked Kerwin. "I have a broken foot!"

"You're pitching... All time pitcher. And I'm not a sir." Mae sneered.

---

After the teams assembled Rock was up first to kick, however it took Kerwin five pitches to make it to Rock, a few even went backwards. Which was odd, but still someone was stupid enough to kick it anyway, Eugene, and it wound up going to Rock.

"OWW!" Stacy yelled as the ball Rock had just kicked connected with her head.

"Oh, sorry Stacy..." Rock mumbled as he ran past her.

"JERK!" Stacy snapped.

Rock laughed before sliding for second.

"ROCK! WOOO!" The kickers screamed as he was declared safe.

"Ms. Young! Coach peed his pants!" Jeff exclaimed, raising his hand.

"I DID NOT!" Coach snapped.

"Did too! There's yellow stuff by your feet." Jeff pointed to the floor.

"No, Jeff... That's the color of the gym floor." Matt stated, patting Jeff on the shoulder.

"Man, what do you know!" Jeff hissed, slapping Matt's hand away.

Just as the line moved up a little, Matt slipped in something, causing everyone to glare at Coach.

"YOU DID PEE YOUR PANTS!" Someone exclaimed.

"Oh my god.." Mae shook her head, "Coach... Go change, then after you're done.. clean up your pee. Everyone try not to step in it or roll around in it. Oh and Matt, you may go change as well."

Matt and Coach headed back to the locker room, Jeff smirking as he yelled. "I TOLD YOU SO!"

Matt shook his head, mumbling something about how he was just testing Jeff or something like that.

"Christy you're up!" Mae exclaimed.

"OH yay!" Christy exclaimed, jumping onto the plate.

Kerwin shook his head and rolled the ball, coincidentally it rolled in the puddle of pee.

"Well there goes the game." Mae mumbled.

"Oh come on!" Everyone complained.

"I'm going to beat that kid up." Kane hissed, smashing his fists together.

---

Meanwhile...

"Draw me the statue of liberty to your best ability." Al requested.

"Mr. Snow... I do not know what the statue of liberty is." Jade, a foreign exchange student who coincidentally knew English.

"Well draw a statue, and write liberty on it." Al replied.

"OKAY!" Jade exclaimed, starting to draw a picture of a statue.

"Randy... Do you think this looks good?" Dave asked, holding up his paper.

"Dave.. He asked us to draw a picture of the statue of liberty... That's a butterfly." Randy declared.

Dave glared at the paper, which had a perfectly drawn butterfly on it.

"So..." Dave mumbled, before writing liberty on the butterfly. "Now it can be the statue of liberty. Let me see yours if you're so damn good!"

"Okay..." Randy replied before holding up a fairly well drawn statue of liberty.

"Who knew everyone in our class was a professional artist?" Undertaker exclaimed as he drew a picture of a grave with a hand sticking out of the ground.

"That's an interesting statue of liberty Taker..." Al mumbled as he passed him.

"Thanks... I drew it myself!" Undertaker stated.

"Okay, now let's share our pictures... Taker how about you first?" Al asked.

"Okay... Here is my statue of liberty. Like it or you shall... REST IN PEACE!" Undertaker warned, rolling his eyes back.

"Oh snap!" Cena exclaimed. "Your eyes are in the back of your head man!"

"Ah... Let's just ah... Free draw for the rest of the hour." Al offered, before rushing to his desk and typing an e-mail to the principal about how he thinks Taker is a bad influence on the other kids.

_To Be Continued..._

_Pairings will be formed later in the story, like the next chapter or so..._


	3. Chapter 3

**Well This Sucks... Chapter Two... I mean Three**  
**Summary: **Selected superstars of the WWE are taken to school! This time it ain't kindergarten, but sixth grade! How will they cope with the evil seventh and eighth graders that are out to make their life a living hell?  
**Disclaimer:** Still don't own anyone or anything...  
**Pairing(s):** Read and maybe you'll find out...  
**Author Notes:** Thanks for all the reviews.. Hopefully this chapter will be slightly longer. Oh and if you need to use the restroom, do so BEFORE reading.. Don't need people peeing their pants… Lol, don't sue me if you do!

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The bell rang one more, second hour was over. The halls were over crowded with sixth graders trying to find their way to their third hour class. Candice, Torrie, Trish and Maria had all decided to share their schedules and see what classes they had together.

"OH! I have Science with you Trish!" Candice exclaimed.

"Awesome... What hour?" Trish asked.

"Ah, third." Candice replied.

Trish nodded as Torrie sighed, "I have Reading next.."

"Oh I do too!" Maria beamed.

"Ladies, third hour starts in a few minutes... You may wanna get to your classes before you're marked absent." Al stated as he stopped before the four girls.

"Okay.. Mr. Snow!" Maria shouted, glaring at his name tag.

"Well I'll see you at Science Candice!" Trish called before walking off to her next class.

"Bye Trish!" Candice yelled back.

Al glared at the remaining three before they rushed off to their classes.

---

"Welcome to 3rd hour Reading class! I'm Mrs. McMahon and I'm going to be your teacher from now until the end of the year... I have a few rules in this classroom that I'd like you to follow.. One, no talking when I'm talking. Two, you must bring your reading book to class EVERY day... Any questions?" Linda asked.

"Ah, yeah... This is Language class." Rock pointed out

"Wha-what!" Linda exclaimed before glaring at her schedule. "Oh, well I had Reading third hour last year.. Sort of my instinct to greet you that way. Well, welcome to third hour Language!"

"It's great to be here." Jericho replied sarcastically.

"Now that's the spirit!"

"Oh my god... We got the retarded language teacher." Jericho mumbled.

"At least she's not as stupid as that Maria chick." Rock stated.

"You got that right!" Jericho exclaimed.

"BOYS! Will I have to separate you two?" Linda asked.

"Ah, no Mr. McMahon!" Jericho replied.

"It's MRS!" Linda snapped.

"Could have fooled me..." Jericho mumbled.

---

"Now, kids... I want to welcome you to my science class... As you can see I've got an experiment already started." Mankind stated.

"Ah, what experiment?" Trish asked.

"This one." Mankind replied, pulling out a sock from his sweat pants.

"EWWW!" Candice exclaimed.

"What is THAT!" John snapped.

"THAT? Mr. Socko is not a 'that'. Mr. Sock is a deadly weapon!" Mankind declared.

"If he's so deadly why is he here!" Coach hissed.

"Because Mr. Socko will punish those who are bad." Mankind replied.

"Oh really?" Coach challenged.

"You seriously want to test me boy?" Mankind asked.

"Hit me with your best shot!" Coach sneered.

Mankind put Mr. Sock on his hand and shoved it into Coach's mouth.

"OH MY GOD!" Trish and Candice screamed.

"Haha... Coach is a loser." John teased.

JBL and Orlando crossed their arms.

"He's so out of the group..." JBL commented.

"Yeah." Orlando agreed.

After Coach passed out Mankind got back on his feet.

"Hey! Get back to your class!" Mankind ordered.

"Sorry, Mr. Mankind... We just wanted to see the show." JBL stated.

"Well show's over, kiddies!" Mankind replied.

---

"Can you believe our Science teacher?" Trish asked as she and Candice left the room.

"No, he put a sock in a kids mouth!" Candice stated.

"Well that was interesting." Rey mumbled.

"That was very entertaining." John insisted.

"Sure, it was, but completely disgusting!" Rey replied.

"Ehhhh..." Coach muttered while holding his stomach. "I think I'm going to be si--"

Coach stopped talking for he had thrown up and the rest of the kids laughed before pushing him down in his own puke. Talk about sick. Ewww! Anyhow, another kid was so disgusted that he threw up on Coach, who was already in his own puke and now in someone else's puke as well. Now isn't that a coincidence? While the Janitor had a mess to clean up Coach was given a referral for puking in a hall way and rolling around in it and provoking another student to throw up.

"What's a referral?" Coach asked, who was still covered in puke.

"A 45 minute detention with me!" Vince sneered.

"WHAT!" Coach exclaimed before he fainted.

"And that's another referral for getting my carpet full of your puke! You little bastard!" Vince hissed.

Vince walked over to the 'call button'.

"Yes?" Came a voice.

"We've got a drunk student here, who will get an in-school suspension!" Vince stated.

"Okay Mr. McMahon! We'll get the school nurse and Officer Austin there before you know it!" The voice said.

Vince shuddered at the mere mention of Officer Austin, who was the most feared School Officer in the school history and also a thorn in Vince's side, but that's another story.

"Mr. McDonald we've come for the boy." Austin stated.

"It's McMahon." Vince corrected.

"What?" Austin taunted.

"I said it's MCMAHON!" Vince snapped.

"Well you don't need to shout, I can hear you know." Austin replied.

Debra rolled her eyes, "So where's the kid?"

"There!" Vince exclaimed, pointing at the flag pole outside.

"Why is he hanging upside down on the flag pole?" Debra asked.

"Because he got puke all over my office! And JBL needed to teach him a lesson." Vince replied.

"You mean that fag that's always wearing cowboy hats and suits?" Austin questioned.

"Yeah, that kid." Vince mumbled.

Austin took out a beer and downed it in a matter of seconds before he hopped on his four wheeler and zoomed off in search of the fag who always wears cowboy hats and suits, psst, it's JBL! While Austin ran over JBL a few times Debra helped Coach off the flag pole, but she accidentally dropped him on his head.

"Ah, well, no harm done, right?" Debra stated after she dropped him.

Then she dragged him back into the school by his left leg, accidentally hitting his head on the door frame as she did so.

"Well, not like he needs to be conscious when I bring him back..." Debra muttered.

Then Austin came back and accidentally ran over Coach as he did sped past Debra, he had JBL, who was knocked out, on the back of his four wheeler. When he ran over Coach JBL flung out and landed on top of Coach. A group of kids came by and started pointing and laughing.

"They're gay!" The kids taunted. "GAY!"

Austin shrugged, not bothering to tell them what really happened and then he opened another beer. After he downed another beer he dropped JBL off in the detention room, on his head by the way. While Austin did that Debra continued to drag Coach before she threw him in the showers and turned the water onto steaming hot. After Coach ran out screaming Debra left and allowed Coach to go back to class, which he was late for.

---

"COACH!" Hogan yelled.

"Yeah Mr. Hogan?" Coach questioned as he walked into the class room.

"Did you pee your pants?" Rock asked.

"NO!" Coach snapped.

"Brother, you better take a seat before I give you a referral!" Hogan hissed.

"Another referral? I've gotten two already!" Coach complained.

"That's because you're a little bitch, just like Shelton!" Jericho stated.

"HEY!" Shelton snapped.

"Sorry man, it had to be said." Jericho replied.

"No it didn't!" Shelton declared.

"Did too."

"Did NOT!"

"DID TOOO!"

"DID NOOOOT!"

"SHUT UP!" Hogan ordered.

The class grew quiet and Coach took his seat next to the teacher aid, Mae Young.

"AH!" Coach exclaimed, falling out of his chair as he noticed Mae.

"What is wrong with you?" Hogan asked, shaking his head.

"She... She scared me!" Coach insisted.

Hogan stared at Mae, who smiled and had like four teeth missing. Hogan shuddered before he sighed.

"I guess it's okay that you were scared... I mean, who wouldn't be scared of that... That..." Hogan started, but then received a look from Mae. "BEAUTIFUL creature?"

"Beautiful creature? Are you HIGH!" Cena snapped.

"Or drunk?" Kane added.

"NO AND NO!" Hogan yelled.

---

Meanwhile, in the gym a group of students were sitting around, doing nothing.

"What do you think happened to the teacher?" Dave asked.

"I bet she got ran over by a forklift!" Undertaker insisted.

"A forklift? WHO could get a forklift into the school?" Randy snapped.

"Did I say it was in school?" Undertaker asked.

"He's got a point." Dave stated.

"Yes, he does, but don't tell him I said that." Randy replied.

"What are the odds our teacher passed out drunk behind the bleachers?" Rey questioned as he walked in.

"WHAT?" The kids exclaimed.

The group of kids ran to the bleachers, where sure enough their teacher was passed out.

"Is that even a teacher?" Molly asked.

"No... That's the janitor..." John replied.

"How can you tell?" Randy snapped.

"Because he's got a keychain of like a million keys!" John informed him.

"He has a point." Dave stated.

"Oh shut up!" Randy hissed.

_To Be Continued..._

WHOO! I finally updated! What'd you guys think! Please review! I'd say read, but I bet you probably already did that!


	4. Chapter 4

**Well This Sucks... Chapter Twenty-Eight... I mean Four!**  
**Summary: **Selected superstars of the WWE are taken to school! This time it ain't kindergarten, but sixth grade! How will they cope with the evil seventh and eighth graders that are out to make their life a living hell?  
**Disclaimer:** I own Randy Orton... In my dreams... (evil laugh)  
**Pairing(s):** For now... There aren't any... For I am too stupid to remember who I ever wanted to pair up.

**Author Notes:** I have no clue what I'm gonna do with pairings! So please peoples let your voice be heard and tell me who I should pair up! AND GOD! I wrote chapter two on both chapters two and three... Why didn't anyone tell me?

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Now the kids in the gym were throwing dodge balls at the Janitor, seeing if he'd wake up. However, after they ran out of dodge balls someone suggested that they throw basketballs at him. You can only guess who suggested that, if you guess John, then you were right. The kids tossed basketballs and as weird as it sounds someone actually hit a bar that linked the bleachers to the wall and it came back and knocked them out.

"Damn." John mumbled as the kid laid on the floor.

"What an idiot." Randy commented.

"Who the hell knocks them self out with a basketball!" Rey exclaimed, shaking his head.

"Apparently Molly Holly." Undertaker replied.

"Apparently." The other kids agreed.

"Hey! What are you kids doing?" Vince yelled as he came into the gym.

"Mr. Janitor and Molly got into a fight! They threw basketballs and dodge balls! And he knocked her out with a basketball! Then he passed out drunk!" Benoit explained.

"Is this true?" Vince questioned the rest of the kids.

"Yeah." Everyone replied.

"Well, that student is fired! And the janitor is expelled!" Vince stated.

Everyone stood in silence, Vince's new personal assistant Terri nudged him.

"Vince, you've got it the wrong way... The student is expelled. The janitor is fired." Terri pointed out.

"No, that student is fired! Don't make me change my mind about hiring you!" Vince warned.

"Okay, Mr. McMahon." Terri mumbled.

---

The bell rang once more, it was finally 6th grade lunch time. The kids rushed into the cafeteria and shocking some kids even beat one another with trays to get what they wanted. Shame that Val was beaten by a mob of ten kids.

"Do you realize that we've sent ten kids home with injuries on the first day?" Linda asked.

"Who cares, at least they're having fun!" Vince replied.

Just as Vince said that the group of ten kids grabbed trays and started whacking Coach with the said trays.

"See, they're playing hit the Coach now! It's so cute." Vince commented.

"I wonder if candy will come out!" One of the kids exclaimed as they hit Coach.

"What the... Those kids are evil." Mark Henry, one of the lunch guys, stated.

"What do you mean you don't have apple juice!" Maria exclaimed.

"What? I didn't say anything..." Mark replied.

"Maria, just keep walking." John mumbled.

Maria started crying and tossed her tray before she ran away, coincidently it hit Coach in the back of the head, knocking him out.

"Oh god, that Coach kid is knocked out again, Austin!" Mae exclaimed.

"Really now? I thought he died." Austin commented, drinking a beer as he watched the kids rob him.

Just as the kids ran away with Coach's money two kids walked up to Coach and started kicking him. One kicked him in the face and then the other hit him over the head with his guitar.

"That's what you get for being a loser!" Jericho exclaimed as Rock hit Coach with his guitar.

"Why does that kid have a guitar?" Linda questioned.

"He's in a band." Vince replied.

"Do you even know him?" Linda asked.

"No, but I'm guessing he's in a band." Vince stated.

---

Meanwhile; Trish, Lita, Victoria and Gail were all sitting with the 2005 Student Search winner and three of the losers.

"Ha, you three lost!" Ashley exclaimed.

"Odd..." Trish mumbled.

"Who cares? Shut up Ashley before I moonsault your ass!" Lita snapped.

"Whatever." Ashley replied, waving her off.

"Ashley's a bitch." Leyla whispered to Elisabeth.

"Yes, she is." Elisabeth agreed.

"Hey guys!" Christy exclaimed as she walked up the table with Candice and Torrie.

"Ashley, what are you doing here?" Candice sneered.

"I go to school here, idiot." Ashley hissed.

"I know that, but you're not cool enough to sit by us!" Candice replied.

"She has a point." Cameron stated.

"Shut up! You're a loser!" Ashley snapped.

"And you're a bitch, now go away!" Victoria ordered.

"Yeah!" The rest of the girls agreed.

"How rude!" Ashley exclaimed as she got up.

"Yes, how rude." Randy agreed, with a smirk.

"Randy... Dave... Nice to see you two passed fifth grade." Lita replied.

"What are you talking about! Dave didn't pass fifth grade!" Randy insisted.

"What? Man, I passed! You barely passed!" Dave snapped.

"Sure you did." Randy murmured.

"Why are you two here anyway?" Trish asked.

"Because... Dave wants to ask Lita out." Randy replied.

Dave stared at Randy, while Lita stared at the table.

"Ewww." Lita mumbled before getting up.

"He's lying!" Dave yelled after the redhead.

The rest of the girls at the table stared at Dave, who now wanted to kill Randy. Randy glared at Dave and then waved to the girls before he ran away, Dave quickly ran after him. The two ran toward Austin and Mae, even though most people run away from Mae. Still let them run toward them. As Randy ran past Austin, Austin put his foot out and tripped him.

"Austin, you can't trip the kids." Mae stated.

"I just did." Austin replied.

"Ahh!" Randy screamed as Dave stopped running.

"I haven't even touched you!" Dave exclaimed.

"Right." Randy mumbled.

"You're a sissy-boy." John commented as he walked by.

"Shut up! You don't even have a girlfriend!" Randy snapped.

"Neither do you." Dave pointed out.

Randy turned to Dave, "Shut up!"

Just as Dave was about to talk Lita walked by, however she kept her distance. John stared at her and then glared at Dave.

"Is it just me or does she not want to be by you?" John asked.

Dave crossed his arms, "The sissy-boy here told her that I wanted to ask her out."

"Really now? So do you?" John questioned.

"Ah, no. I don't. I'd rather ask Mae out!" Dave exclaimed.

John backed away slightly, "Mae has to be at least 70 years old... You're one sick puppy. Just please, stay away from me."

"What? I mean the girl named Mae! Not Mae Young! The... Eww! The gym teacher?" Dave snapped.

"There is no girl named Mae in this school." Randy pointed out.

Just as Randy said that a foreign exchange student with a name tag that read, "Mae" walked by.

"Well what do you know! There really is a girl named Mae!" Dave exclaimed.

"What are the odds?" John mumbled.

"Like 1-20... Wait! I bet her name isn't even Mae!" Randy stated.

"No, please, don't go up to her and ask... You'll make a fool out of yourself." John replied.

"Oh shut up! Leave me alone." Randy snapped.

While Randy stormed off, Dave followed and John laughed at the image of them.

"I bet they're gay." Rock declared.

"They probably are." John agreed.

"Hey, my name is The Rock!" Rock announced, offering a hand.

"Wow, your parents must have hated you." John commented, shaking his hand.

"No, that's my nick-name. My real name is Dwayne. But don't tell the teachers. They'll start calling me that." Rock replied.

"That's cool. I'm J to the O to the H to the N. Yeah, bitch." John stated.

"Hey! No swearing in school!" The janitor snapped.

"Weren't you fired?" John questioned.

"Shit.." The janitor mumbled before he started mopping the floor.

"Hey! I fired you!" Vince exclaimed.

The janitor looked up and then ran away, Vince quickly ran after him as he yelled, "GET BACK HERE, DAMNIT!"

"We should just inch away and say we never seen anything." Rock whispered.

"Yeah.." John agreed.

_To Be Continued..._

Yeah, I know... It wasn't right of Austin to trip Randy, but that's something Austin would do! Lol, anyhow... REVIEW! Or else no next chapter... I know... I'm lying... Sadly... I'm a bad, bad liar... lol


	5. Chapter 5

**Well This Sucks... Chapter Five, Not Six!  
Summary: **Selected superstars of the WWE are taken to school! This time it ain't kindergarten, but sixth grade! How will they cope with the evil seventh and eighth graders that are out to make their life a living hell?  
**Disclaimer:** I own John Cena & the janitor... riiight!  
**Pairing(s):** As of now... NONE!

**Author Notes: Lalalala... My only note is that I'm crazy... Heh, what else is new?**

**------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

After lunch, the students were ordered to go to the auditorium for a school wide announcement. While they waited they talked, of course it wasn't just whispering it actually sounded very similar to what you'd imagine a room of 500 people talking at once... But yeah, it wasn't hard to stop the talking... Okay, I'm lying, but Vince finally gained control and starting talking.

"As you may know, we've had a lot of injuries today... So many that the school board has already called and announced that the school will go to a schedule where everyone is in the same class room and the teachers go from room to room. They think that may be easier." Vince announced.

Everyone gasped, while Eugene started clapping his hands and jumping up and down in his seat. Vince stared at Eugene as he appeared to be having a seizure. The kids who were seated next to him freaked out and jumped out of their seats, backing away from him quickly.

"What is his problem?" Vince asked.

"He's retarded!" Coach replied.

"Shut up puke boy!" Austin ordered, throwing a beer can at Coach's head.

To everyone's surprise that beer can actually knocked him out. Eugene started yelling some weird words that made no sense while two people came in with a straight jacket.

"Take him to the mentally retarded room." Vince ordered.

"We don't have one of those rooms." One of the men stated.

"Well make one then!" Vince replied.

"How about Eric's room?" The other asked.

"Perfect!" Vince stated.

"Excuse me? Vince, that's my classroom...!" Eric exclaimed.

"He's your nephew! Plus, it isn't your classroom any more!" Vince snapped.

"Daddy, can I have a cell phone?" Stephanie asked.

"Of course, princess. Now go sit down." Vince replied.

"Brat." John commented.

"She is.." Lita agreed, leaning forward and resting her arms on the seat before her.

John glared back at her, "Someone needs to beat her down... You can do it."

Lita laughed, "No thanks. I don't want to be kicked out of school for beating down a whore."

"Shhh!" Mae ordered.

"Shush-it." John mocked, putting a finger up to his lips.

Lita glared at Mae, who surprising gave John the one finger salute. Lita and John's jaws dropped, Lita quickly grabbed Trish's attention, who was also shocked. Maria raised her hand.

"Yes, Mariah?" Vince questioned.

"That old lady is putting up her middle finger at Josh!" Maria exclaimed.

"Who?" Both Lita and John asked at once.

"That guy! YOU!" Maria replied, pointing at John.

"I'm John, not Josh..." John corrected.

"I like cookies." Maria stated.

John, Lita, Mae, Trish and Vince all looked forward, trying to figure out how she could be so stupid.

"Can I run her over?" Austin questioned.

"No, we can't afford any more injuries." Vince mumbled.

"Her parents may thank us." Eric commented.

"True, but still..." Vince replied.

**-x-xx-x-**

"I like kitties... I like meow mix, please deliver!" Maria sang as she walked through the hallway.

A foreign exchange student from California literally pulled out a gun and started shooting at Maria. Everyone started screaming and Maria started running like a fag, before she finally ran into a wall and knocked herself out. The kid put his gun back in his pocket and walked away as if nothing happened.

"NOOO! Not my baby!" Coach cried.

Everyone stared at Coach, who had a deflated ball in his hand, which was obviously hit by a bullet.

"Did you steal that kickball from the gym?" Dave asked.

"No... Mae gave it to me since it rolled in my pee." Coach snapped.

"Ewww, Matt fell in it too!" Jeff teased.

"No, I didn't...!" Matt sneered, crossing his arms.

"You did too, monkey butt!" Edge replied.

"Who?" Matt questioned.

"You, jackass, now go butt fuck some guys in the boys bathroom." Jericho ordered.

"Matt, you're gay?" Jeff asked.

"NOOO!" Matt exclaimed.

"Sure you aren't." Rock mumbled.

Before Matt could protest again, Eric and Linda walked up to the group of kids.

"GET TO CLASS!" Linda hissed.

"YEAH, RIGHT NOW!" Eric added.

"Go fuck yourself." Jericho replied before he walked off.

**-x-xx-x-**

"Welcome to table class... I am Al Snow, I teach art and of course table class..." Al announced.

"This is my kind of class." Bubba exclaimed.

"Same here, bro." D-Von agreed.

"I hate tables!" Trish exclaimed, crossing her arms.

"Same here... Assholes you put me through a table in 4th grade!" Lita sneered, gesturing to Bubba.

"You liked it and you know it." Bubba replied.

"Sure I did." Lita mumbled sarcastically.

"See, you liked it!" D-Von stated.

"No I didn't!" Lita protested.

"Shut up!" Coach screamed.

"Hey, Coach! Go to detention! There will be no talking in my class!" Al snapped.

"What! I was only telling them to be quiet!" Coach exclaimed.

"Too bad! Now go!" Al sneered.

Coach pouted before he ran out of the room crying like a little bitch, while a few people took pictures of him doing so to put in the year book. Why on earth they were already doing that was pretty much unexplainable, but they did it anyway. As Coach skipped to detention he received a few curious looks from students who were also sent to detention, but, unlike Coach, were going in the correct direction. As Coach skipped long side the lockers he failed to notice Stacy going to her locker and when she opened it she slammed the door right in Coach's face, knocking him out.

"Opps." Stacy exclaimed before looking around to see if anyone noticed.

She seen Chris and Rock walking down the hallway with a broken guitar, she quickly ran up to them and told them that she knocked Coach out. The two laughed before they suggested to stuff him in a locker. Therefore, the three of them shoved him into his locker after they broke it open with a crowbar that they stole from Mr. Mankind's class room. After they bolted it shut with nails and a hammer that they stole from Mr. Snow's class from they ran away laughing.

**-x-xx-x-**

Meanwhile, a group of kids were currently skipping class so they could talk about none other than the popular subject of girls.

"So… You don't like Lita?" John asked.

"No.. Man, she's pretty, but I like Torrie." Dave replied.

"Torrie? Torrie Wilson?" Randy questioned.

"No.. Torrie Young!" Dave snapped sarcastically.

"The gym teacher's daughter?" John asked.

Dave blinked, "Her daughter has to be at least 30 years old!"

"True." John, Randy and Hunter agreed.

Hunter was one of the most popular and feared eighth graders in the entire school, hanging out with sixth graders would probably be frowned upon if it weren't for John and Hunter being brothers. While, Randy was exceptionally 'cool' in Hunter's opinion. Dave was another story, to Hunter Dave was on the same level of physicality. However, Hunter had been held back last year, he was still feared because of his 'toy'. That toy being the sledgehammer that he literally kept in his locker.

"So… Lil' bro, you got your eyes set on anyone?" Hunter questioned, putting his arm around his younger brother's shoulders.

"Well.. There is this girl.. I've kinda liked her since like kindergarten… But she would neva go for a guy like me." John relied sadly.

"What's her name? Maybe I could get her to go out with you?" Hunter offered.

"Well… Maybe, if you threatened her…But I don't want you to threaten her!" John stated.

"I wasn't going to… Just tell me her name, I won't laugh. I swear." Hunter promised.

"Fine… Her name is Lita." John informed him.

"I knew it!" Randy exclaimed.

"Shut up!" John ordered, narrowing his eyes at the taller boy.

"Man, there isn't anything wrong with liking Lita. She's pretty." Dave stated.

"She's hot." John agreed.

Hunter smirked, "Well.. I'm sure that if you asked her out.. She'd say yes."

"Rite, stop gettin' my hopes up." John mumbled, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

Randy, Dave and Hunter watched as the love struck boy walked off. Hunter shook his head.

"My brother is a loser." Hunter muttered.

To Be Continued…

**By the request of a friend… it's gonna be John/Lita. So, what'd you think!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Well This Sucks... Chapter Six, Not Sixty!**

**Summary: **Selected superstars of the WWE are taken to school! This time it ain't kindergarten, but sixth grade! How will they cope with the evil seventh and eighth graders that are out to make their life a living hell?

**Disclaimer:** I own no one.. so please, don't sue me.

**Pairing(s):** Possible John/Lita

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Finally, the first day was over. Yes it was now the second day of school, one which would be pretty promising if John Cena could get to the girl that he had desired to talk to for some time now. However, things would never go your way if you went to the WWE Junior High... Unless you were Stephanie or Shane McMahon, but that's another story. It was currently 'new schedule' time in the auditorium. There wasn't a kid in the entire room that wasn't talking about who they wanted to see in their classes. With great ease, JBL and Orlando inched their way to Mr. McMahon.

"Sir, we have the money we said we'd pay you if you'd put us in the same classes together. Oh and with Doug and Danny, of course." JBL whispered, handing him a wad of about a hundred dollars in singles.

"All singles?" Vince asked.

"Just as you asked." Orlando replied.

"Good. Now hurry off before someone sees you." Vince ordered.

"Yes, sir." Orlando and JBL responded at once.

After the two of them ran off, John walked up to Mr. McMahon, in hopes that he could possibly talk the elder man into placing himself, Dave, Randy and Lita in the same class.

"Can I help you?" Vince asked.

"Yea, you can. You see, my best friends an' I wanna be in the same classes togetha." John started.

"Really now. Do you have one hundred dollars, or close to one hundred dollars, in cash?" Vince questioned.

"Why would I have a hundred dollars in singles?" John inquired.

"Ah, no reason.. Well, I'll see what I can do." Vince answered.

JBL's jaw dropped as John walked off, "We could have just said that? My mom was mad at me for stealing fifty out of dad's piggy bank!"

"My dad was mad at me for selling his gun for ten dollars." Orlando informed him.

"When you could have gotten a hundred?" JBL exclaimed.

"Who'd you sell it to?" Doug asked.

"Him." Orlando replied, pointing at Austin.

They all stared at him as he cleaned the gun with some sort of polisher, a smirk coming across his face as he cocked the gun.

"And he brought it to school?" JBL exclaimed with a scared expression on his face.

"Did you tell him your name?" Danny asked.

"Ah, yeah.. So he could be nice to me instead of run me over with his tractor like he always does." Orlando replied.

"What tractor?"

"The thing he's like sitting on right now." Orlando stated as if they were all stupid.

"That's a four wheeler, jackass." Jericho informed him.

"Yeah, bitch." Rock added with a smirk.

"How rude." JBL commented.

"Look, it's a gay jackass! What grade are you in?" Jericho asked.

Before JBL could speak Rock cut in, "IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT GRADE YOU'RE IN!"

JBL blinked as the two walked off laughing. Mae was still walking around with her middle finger in the air, for some reason she couldn't put it down and now it was permanently stuck like that. As she limped past a group of foreign exchange students from Alaska, they all gasped. One even took off their glove to give her the one finger salute before they threw their shoe at her head.

"That's for Adam Sandler!" The kid yelled as the rest of the kids cheered him on.

"They're demons." A kid from the group of real foreign exchange students from Canada and Ontario.

While Mae laid knocked out on the auditorium floor, a few kids started to poke her to see if she was alive. And when she didn't move they started cheering, until Mr. Mankind ordered them to stop. Finally, they started handing out schedules. A few kids were crying because they'd be with Big Show and Kane for the rest of the year. While others were happily talking with their friends about how the year would turn out with them being in the same classes. Meanwhile, a group of girls were talking about which 'group' they were in as they have been given a group number, the people in their class and their schedule for the rest of the year.

"I got… Edge… Christian… Matt…" Trish read off slowly. "Well this sucks!"

"Not as bad as it sucks for me… I've got Randy Orton, John Cena, Dave Batista, Coach Coachman, Chris Jericho, Rock Johnson and Maria!" Lita stated sadly.

"What's wrong with Maria?" Candice asked.

"What **_isn't _**wrong with Maria?" Torrie replied, rolling her eyes.

"That was really mean." Victoria declared.

"But true." Lita added as she shrugged her shoulders.

"Let me see that..." Trish mumbled as she took Lita's schedule and list of classmates away from her.

"You got Bischoff for Math... That retard Mae for gym..." Trish read off.

There was a sudden sound of a scream, this scream had came from none other than The Coach, who was being yelled at by Mae. Mae apparently had gave him the 'bird' and he called her a stupid bitch, Mae grabbed Coach's ear and dragged him to the office.

"Looks like Mae can put her middle finger down again..." Victoria commented as they rushed past them.

"Good thing too." Torrie muttered.

Trish cleared her throat, "You have Snow for Art... Ross for Language..."

Meanwhile, Randy and John were studying their schedules as well. John grinning as he heard he and Lita were in the same class, for some reason he thought that that would make his chances of going out with her greater.

"You seriously need help." Dave stated as John dug through his backpack.

"What? I don't see nothin' wrong with me." John replied as he pulled out a small t-shirt.

"You stole a girl's shirt... why, I honestly don't want to know." Randy pointed out.

"Man, I didn't 'steal' her shirt.. I borrowed it. There's a big difference." John corrected quickly.

Randy blinked, "Borrowed? How does that work?"

"Well... I took it, but I plan on returnin' it." John informed him.

"When? When you two get together? She'd probably dump you if she found out you stole her shirt." Dave insisted.

"Or she might think it was kinky.." Randy declared with a smirk. "God, if she does I might have to go out with her."

John smacked Randy upside the head, "Man, shut up.. You don't even know what two plus two is."

"I do so! It's twenty-two! Everyone knows that!" Randy exclaimed.

"Sure they do…" John mumbled.

Meanwhile, Chris Jericho and Rock were watching the three boys, shaking their heads as they started spitting spitballs at the annoying pair of Matt Hardy and Ashley Massaro, who were apparently going out.

"Haha!" Jericho teased as a spitball hit Matt's face.

"Man, cut it out!" Matt yelled as he brushed the spitball off his face.

"Ewww." Ashley mumbled.

"Fuck this!" Rock snapped before he threw the straw at Matt. "God, let's go annoy Hurricane and Rosey again."

"Yeah, they're always fun to tease…" Jericho mumbled as they walked away.

"That was…" Matt started.

"Odd." Ashley finished.

**-x-xx-x-**

After Randy and Dave did some major persuading John was finally going to make his first attempt at talking to Lita. Of course his first task would be to get her away from her friends so he could strike up a conversation without Trish Stratus telling him what he should and shouldn't say half the time. How he was going to do that… he was very uncertain.

He finally came up with a plan as he 'paid' Chris Masters, a seventh grader who was pretty buff for his age, to distract the girls while he plotted to pull Lita away from the group. So while Chris walked up to the girls John would figure Lita would most likely leave the other girls to drool over him, however things don't always go as planned..

Turns out Chris hadn't had the slightest clue who Lita was, and when he was told not to talk to her.. Well, he just so happened to the Lita was Christy. Therefore, when the spunky redhead jumped in front of him he ignored her, smirking at the other girls as he went around Christy. Christy started to cry and ran away and then ran into the nearest restroom to cry her eyes out. Chris' gaze settling on the other redhead in the group, who was looking the older boy up and down. While Randy and Dave tried their best not to break out into laughter John was trying to figure out why on earth Chris was hitting on Lita.

"This kid totally ain't professional.." John mumbled as he shook his head.

"That's because you said the redhead, while pointing at Christy… Dumbass." Dave stated.

"Shit!" John muttered.

"You're such a loser." Randy declared.

"If I'm lucky he'll leave 'em alone." John commented.

"Sure, that'll happen." Dave replied as Chris received the redhead's phone number.

John's jaw dropped before he slapped Randy upside the head again.

"What was that for!" Randy yelled as he rubbed the back of his head.

"That was your 'man' and you fuckin' ruined my shot with Lita there!" John snapped.

"I'm sorry?" Randy offered. "How was I supposed to know he'd go after Lita? I mean Trish is finer…"

Once again John smacked Randy upside the head.

"Lita's better." John protested.

_To Be Continued…_

_Sorry if it was sort or bad… Next chapter should be a little better._


	7. Chapter 7

**Well This Sucks... Chapter Seven**

**Summary: **Selected superstars of the WWE are taken to school! This time it ain't kindergarten, but sixth grade! How will they cope with the evil seventh and eighth graders that are out to make their life a living hell?

**Disclaimer:** I own no one.. so please, don't sue me.

**Pairing(s):** Possible John/Lita

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So maybe he did point to the wrong girl.. What was the big deal? Chris Masters wouldn't be interested in dating Lita anyway. Or would he? John shook those thoughts out of his head, sighing as he and Hunter watched for their mother, who normally picked them up.

"Mom's late." Hunter stated as he glanced at his watch.

"Glad to see you can tell time." John muttered.

"Shut up," Hunter ordered as he rolled his eyes.

John glanced around, "I almost talked to Lita today."

"Good for you." Hunter replied before raising an eyebrow. "How did it go, then?"

"Not very well.. Chris Masters sort of went after the wrong girl when I asked him to distract. I didn't get to talk to her." John explained.

"Chris is a retard, why would you _let_ him distract girls? You should have walked right up to them and asked if you could talk to Lita, dumbass." Hunter declared wisely.

"Well excuse me for not being the brightest crayon in the box." John snapped.

Hunter laughed, "Who told you that?"

"Ah, Bischoff did after I told him about the Lita thing." John informed him.

"Why'd you do that? Bitchoff isn't really good at the advice stuff." Hunted pointed out.

"I sort of tripped Masters after he left the auditorium.. Bischoff asked me why I tripped him… So I told him that he took my girlfriend." John explained.

"And what did he say?"

"He said, that I'm not the brightest crayon in the box and I'll never amount to anything, but losing a girlfriend to a seventh grader." John replied easily.

"Even when you're thirty?"

"Even when I'm thirty."

"Really? That's really low… You may be a retard, but damn.. Losing a girlfriend to a seventh grader when you're thirty is like.. Losing your virginity at forty." Hunter exclaimed.

"Do you have to make reference to the forty-year-old virgin now?" John asked in annoyance.

"Yes, I believe I do."

"Well please don't, makes me want to hang myself." John mumbled.

"Well in that case.. I thought the forty-year-old virgin was a very educational film, maybe even a documentary on what your life will be like when you are forty."

John glared at his brother, narrowing his eyes as Hunter laughed. The dark haired boy grabbed his backpack, leap up to his feet and smacked Hunter across the face with the backpack before he sat down again, looking straight forward as Hunter cried like a little baby. A maroon colored mini-van pulled up by the curb, the window rolled down and their mother leaned over to yell..

"GET YOUR ASSES IN THE CAR! I'M FUCKING LATE!"

Hunter blinked and wiped away some of his tears, "Since when does mom curse?"

"I don't know, but that's awesome!"

"COME ON! I DON'T HAVE ALL DAY!" Their mom yelled.

John sprang up to his feet and dashed to the car, taking front seat, leaving Hunter with back. Their mom glared at Hunter, who had a black eye now and raised an eyebrow.

"You get into another fight with that fag boy... JBL, was it?" Their mom questioned.

"Actually, he did. Ya shoulda seen it mom, Hunter peed his pants!" John exclaimed.

"Goddamnit, Hunter! Now I hafta wash your clothes! There goes your McDonalds happy meal!" Their mom snapped.

"What? I didn't get into a fight! I didn't even pee my pants! John smacked me with his backpack!" Hunter sneered.

Their mom looked at John, John smirking before his mom grabbed his backpack, opening it before she searched through it.

"What the..." She mumbled as she pulled out a brick, then tossed it out the widow, the brick smashing a passing car's windshield.

"SHIT MOM!"

"Don't you curse!" She warned as she pulled out a chain, it took her a while to pull it out being that it was so long. "Why the hell is this in here?"

"I... I needed to lock my bike up?" John offered.

She shook her head, tossing the chair outside the window, though it hit a biker in the face and caused him to fly off his bike, the chain encircling his neck. John's jaw dropped as his mom continued to search through the backpack.

"John... Why do you have this in here?" She exclaimed as she glared at a stereo system.

"I... I need music for when I cut my raps!"

"Um, okay.." She muttered before tossing the stereo system out the window, this time it simply shattered across the road. Ten passing cars stopped for they seen the wreckage in the road and crashed into each other, causing one of the smallest pile-ups in the school's history.

"Mom!"

"WHAT!"

"You just killed people!"

"I did not! Shut up Hunter!"

She shook her head, this time chucking the entire backpack out the window. The backpack hit an old man in the face and knocked him out, the two boys stared at their mom, who only shrugged and started the van up. As she pulled out of her parking space she ran over the bikers bike and his helmet as well.

**-x-**

The next day John came to school without his backpack, though that wasn't a surprise to John nor Hunter, but Eric scolded him. For some reason Eric said that John always forgot his backpack.. Even if it was just the second day of school and they just met yesterday.. John ignored the man as he plopped down in one of the first chair he seen, the young man waiting for the last bell to ring as he stared at the carpet.

"Having fun?"

John jumped at the sudden sound of someone talking, the dark haired boy glaring over his shoulder to see the redhead sitting in the chair beside him, she smiled at him. He returned the smile, sitting up in his seat before he spoke.

"Why of course." John replied sarcastically.

"Cool, I hope we get to keep these seats." Lita stated.

"An' why is that?"

"Because I don't want to have to sit by Coach or Maria.." Lita replied, gesturing to the back of the room where the two were conducting a scientific experiment.

"What in the hell are they doin'?" John questioned.

"They're trying to make toast in a toaster..." Lita informed him.

"Oh my god, that.. That's impossible!" John exclaimed sarcastically, rolling his eyes at them. "They really are stupid.."

"Yeah.." Lita agreed, she then glared at him. "Where's your backpack?"

"My mom threw it out the window because I hit Hunter in the face with it." John admitted.

"Why did you do that?" Lita questioned quickly.

"He said I would be a forty year old virgin.." John replied, shaking his head as he got some sort of flashback of it.

"Oh," Lita started. "Well, if it makes you feel any better.. If you're still a virgin when you get to seventh grade, I will do it with you."

"Oh my god, really?" John asked quickly.

"Sure!" Lita responded with a smile.

John hugged her, "Oh my god, I love you!"

She laughed, Randy and Dave shaking their heads as they watched. Randy glared at Dave.

"If I'm a virgin still by seventh grade… do you think a girl will do that for me?" Randy asked.

"Probably not." Dave replied.

"What does John have that I don't?" Randy pouted. "I'm hotter than him."

"Okay.. I won't really argue about looks… I'm not gay." Dave stated.

"Bite me." Randy snapped.

"Why?" Dave inquired.

"I… I heard it on a movie." Randy mumbled.

"Oh, which movie?" Dave questioned.

"I.. I don't even remember." Randy replied sadly.

"Oh, okay." Dave muttered, shaking his head.

"You think I could ask Lita if she'd do that for me, too?" Randy blurted out, raising an eyebrow.

"Don't even bother asking.. John would beat you up." Dave stated.

Randy shrugged, "Like he hasn't beaten me up before?"

"Come to think of it.. He's beaten you up a lot." Dave reminded him.

"So, that's because I called him gay." Randy declared.

Dave ignored him, instead he watched Lita and John. The two were talking about what they would do when, or if, they were still virgins in seventh grade. Oddly enough, they knew a lot about the topic at hand. Though Dave shrugged it off as the bell rang, the two taking a seat at the table next to John and Lita. Eric sighed, yelling at the students to sit down so he could take attendance. Once that task was complete Eric cleared his throat and grabbed a box off the chair in the front of the room.

"Since you all have this class room the entire day… Mr. McMahon wanted me to give you a daily planner that you will keep in this room, except for when you take it home at the end of the day." Eric stated.

Everyone watched as he pulled out a stack of notebook like planners, the older man handing them out to the students, after that task was done Eric plopped down in his chair at the front of the room.

"What are we going to do today, Mr. Bischoff?" Maria asked.

"Do whatever, I'm not in the mood to teach." Eric replied, waving her off.

"Okay!" Maria exclaimed before her and Coach went back to their scientific experiment.

While the other kids took it upon themselves to talk, the two of them attempted to make toast. Undertaker started drawing another masterpiece while Rock and Jericho practiced for their rock concert that would be held tomorrow at the first school dance.

_To Be Continued…_


	8. Chapter 8

**Well This Sucks...  
**  
**Summary: **Selected superstars of the WWE are taken to school! This time it ain't kindergarten, but sixth grade! How will they cope with the evil seventh and eighth graders that are out to make their life a living hell?

**Disclaimer:** Ah, sure... I own the WWE and I'm a billionaire that has nothing better to do than write fan fiction... Riiight... Okay, so I lied, sue me, or well ah, don't sue me... It'd be a total waste of time man!

**Pairing(s):** Read and maybe you'll find out...

**Author Notes:** All the previous chapters have been remodeled.. Hope you all like this chapter.. I'm adding some of the diva search girls sadly.. Need some girls for a certain new plot! Whoo! Go me!

**Chapter Eight**

The next day was Friday, tonight was the first school dance.. However, for some reason no one, save for Jericho and Rock and teachers, knew about this dance.. So it was bound to be one lonely dance. With that in mind Vince quickly got on the speakers to make the daily announcements.

"Welcome to.. What school is this? What? The Middle School of.. Where the hell are we? Chicago? What the--" Suddenly his voice was cut off, everyone glared around the room.

Eric simply went on his daily tasks of writing detention names on the board.. Oddly choosing random kids who smelled bad, looked like shit or just annoyed him. John got half an hour because he was 'looked like shit' and 'annoyed' him. Lita got ten minutes for associating with John. Maria and Coach got a weeks worth of detention for just being stupid. The two were currently crying like children as their toaster was 'broke'. While really Eric hid it in his desk, telling the other kids he didn't want them to be weird today. Then Vince's voice came back on the speakers.

"Sorry about that.. Well, as I was about to say.. Today's announcements are mainly me talking about things I do not know about - go figure - hey! Who the hell wrote these announcements? I did! Good lord I suck..." Vince paused. "Again, sorry.. Um.. Today we have the Swat Team visiting... I wonder why... And we have a conventional meeting about how to use a condom... Apparently students have taken it upon themselves to have intercourse in the janitors closet.. And I dare say, STOP IT! If anything do it in Eric's room." - Eric spit out his coffee and looked horrified as he stared at two people making out in his classroom. - "Today's lunch menu is Sloppy Joe's and, or, meatloaf sandwich." - A few people shuddered at the mention of meatloaf sandwich. - "And tonight we have our first dance.. So be there or be square! Thank you for listening people! Learn. Have sex. Do whatever you do during your day... And have a horrible day.. Hope you all get killed in your sleep tonight."

The couple who were making out stopped, they glared around the room to see everyone staring at them... John was the first to question them, however. A confused look on his face as he pointed at them.

"Do you even go to this school?" John inquired.

"Um, no?" The woman offered.

"How old are you?" Eric asked.

"Pfft, she's 30. I'm 47." The man replied.

Eric looked interested, "How.. Where did you two meet?"

"School dance, dude." The man stated coolly.

"Really? Because I've been--"

"EWW! Bitchoff.. Stop." John pleaded.

Randy, Dave, Jericho and Rock looked remotely appalled while everyone else just tried to ignore the man. The gray haired man simply waved them off, before he sat down to have a conversation with the two... Completely ignoring his duties as a teacher to teach his students.

**-x-**

By the time lunch rolled around it was safe to say that the majority of the students had already found a date or someone to attend the dance with.. Though one John Cena had a certain redhead in mind.. And no, it was not Christy Hemme, but Lita. He had been so close to asking her before, but.. He pussed out. Though he did have Randy and Dave egging him on about asking her, he was sure that lunch was the time to ask. He made sure his breath was okay, made sure his hair was combed and made sure his clothes were nice and loose.. Even if none of those things really made a difference, he just thought it best not to look like shit when he asked her out. Once he arrived he was lucky to see Trish, Stacy, Torrie and the other girls were going outside or to sit with their dates.. Leaving Lita alone. He sat down without a second thought as the girl glared at him, smiling slightly as he leaned over a little to be sure that she heard his question..

"Lita..." John began slowly, Lita encouraging him to talk with a smile. "Will you go to the dance with me?"

Lita's smile disapeared.. A frown appearing in its place. She looked slightly uncomfortable, John too looked uncomfortable.

"I... I'm sorry, John, but.. Someone's already asked me... And well... I sort of said yes." Lita replied, trying to offer him a small smile.

John looked shocked who would dare ask his girl? Most of the guys knew he had claims on her.. Well because he had only spray painted Lita is John Cena's on the boys bathroom wall. But still. Everyone should have known! And now.. Now he just made a fool out of himself. He was going to severely punish the idiot that dared ask his girl out to the dance.

"W-Wh-Who asked?" John questioned, gritting his teeth slightly as he waited for her answer.

Lita blinked, "R-Randy..."

"Randy... Randy Orton?"

"Yeah..." Lita replied.

"That--Excuse me."

Lita watched as John quickly moved away, the girl suspected that he were going to find Randy by the judge of his sudden need to walk away.. The redhead a little worried that she no longer had a date now. She was sure she heard a girl-like scream come from across the cafeteria..

"Oh crap." Lita muttered.

The redhead quickly got up and rushed to where the scream came from, freezing the second she seen John on top of Randy.. Appearing to be wailing on the taller boy without any regard for his well-being.

"JOHN!" Dave shouted. "What the hell are you doing!"

"Poor Randy..." A girl muttered.

"Who are you?" Lita asked, glaring at her.

"You should help your boyfriend." The girl stated.

Lita blinked, though deciding against asking anything, before she then glared at John, who was still beating on Randy. She hurried to grab John's arm, yanking him off of Randy, while Dave grabbed the other. Sheriff Austin was just sitting back and drinking his beer.. He had told people that he was now to be called Sheriff Austin at all times. Or else you got the flag pole.. Upside down. After John was pulled off of Randy, the redhead went to his side.. Wincing at the sight of blood pouring out of his nose.. He held a hand to his nose, tears visible while the redhead wrapped her arms around him.. John struggled against Dave for he did not like the sight of her touching Randy period.. However one of their fellow classmates, Undertaker, helped pull John off to the office while Mae followed them.. Shouting curse words, most suspected that she were drunk. Lita and Randy, however, headed off to the nurse station to get Randy's nose taken care of.

"You took one hell of a beating... Got the shit beaten out of you, you did!" Ms. Ivory, the school nurse, stated.

"Aren't you supposed to be considerate? He just got beaten up! My...Um...Friend...Got beaten up!" Lita snapped, slowing down as she ended her sentence.

Randy glared at her as if to say, "Are you kidding me? I get beat up for you and we still aren't boyfriend and girlfriend?" Though he said nothing, the redhead girl watching as Ivory cleaned up the blood.. Stuffing some kleenexes up his nose to keep it from bleeding more.

"I'll be back in half an hour.. The bleeding should stop by then. And may I say this, those boys will get suspended for this! No dance for them!" Ivory shrieked before she left.

Lita glared at Randy, who crossed his arms and leaned back against the wall as he sat on the medical table that had white paper over it to keep 'germs' away or whatever its use was. No one was really sure, all they knew was it was used in hospitals. Randy sighed and shifted with desire to get some-what comfortable. Lita moved to stand between his legs, offering him a smile as he placed her hands on the material of his jeans.

"You okay?" Lita asked quietly.

"Um.. Not really." Randy replied blankly.

Lita nodded, "Sorry... Um... John is a little--"

"Obessive." Randy finished. "I know, just.. He didn't ask you in time... I wanted to go with you--"

"I know, don't explain. I understand. I... Just feel a little guilty... Should have told me not to tell John.."

"Sorry, I didn't think he'd react like that... Guess I was wrong."

"Yeah.. But I still.. I still want to go with you." Lita stated.

"Yeah, me too." Randy smiled, placing a hand upon hers.

Lita, too, smiled before she leaned forward.. The tall boy a little shocked to say the least as her lips pressed against his. One thought, oddly, came across his mind..

_I wonder if Vince would care if we had sex in the nurses station…_

**To Be Continued.**

**A/N: **_Oh god! Lol, yes this is an odd school… Sex and violence are their thing.. But you will have to wait for the next chapter to see if they did anything, for a little spoiler.. Lita is not a slut… Lol, I need ideas how to use my other characters… So, anyone have any preferences for who I should pair Torrie Wilson and Candice Michelle with? No John Cena, Triple H or Randy Orton for I have plans for those guys. Hehe, Anywho.. Hope it enjoyed this chapter.. Though it mainly focused on John, Randy & Lita.. It is the beginning to a story between the three of them. Next chapter should have interaction between Torrie, Candice and two other guys.. And it may even include the dance! Whoo! Dance.. Lol, don't forget to review!_


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